"Tonight, Tonight "

Tonight wasn't "just any night." Josh had meetings and a temple cleaning assignment and is still gone at 10:30. We ate dinner together with him before he left, then it was time to put the boys to bed. One hour later Sam threw a tantrum when it was time to turn out the lights. He is having nightmares about robbers and refused to sleep in his bed unless I left on the light. He shares a room with Michael and I knew two boys with the lights on equals no sleep so I refused. He went into my room and is sleeping in Josh's spot in our bed.

Then I went to feed Anna, about an hour late after being told I need to keep her on a 3 hour schedule during the day for my own sake. (I'm on my second round of antibiotics for mastitis in two weeks). I fed her downstairs, trying to relax enough to get the job done while Michael was upstairs slamming his door open and shut for 45 minutes. I called to him to come downstairs but he wouldn't which could only mean he messed his pants and didn't want me to know.

Upstairs. I skipped rocking Anna to sleep. I skipped pumping. I convinced Michael I wasn't mad and put Anna in her crib to hope she liked looking at something and wouldn't cry. I made Michael take off his own underwear and wipe his own bum and legs which mortified him. "But I'm scared! It's disgusting! I don't want to touch it!" Guess what, me neither! Maybe this will help get the message through to him that the toilet really is better. He has been making friends with the idea and even went into the bathroom once before doing it in his pants. Tonight he said he did it in his underwear because he had just been to the bathroom, washed his hands, and brushed his teeth. I guess it just sounded too hard to go in their again after just coming out, but the cleaning up may help him get over this issue in time to start preschool in August. Let's all pray! I am looking forward to preschool!

All clean, I get Michael to his room, sans Sam. He then asks me a series of questions that are impossible to ignore: Why did Jesus die on the cross? Why was Heavenly Father sad that he died? Why did the devil trick Eve? Does the devil like daddy? Where does the devil live now? Wow! Really? At 10pm when I am dying to sleep (after I post about this, of course).

So, Anna is sleeping in her crib for the first time ever instead of the bouncy seat in our bedroom. I have to move the nursery monitor. I have to make sure she eats enough during the night and then pump to make sure it's all out so I can get over this infection once and for all.

Sam is sleeping in Josh's spot. I will make Josh move him when he gets home. Michael is contemplating the universe but cannot make it to the toilet to do his business. I have to wash the pump, read the Book of Mormon, and try to fall asleep before Anna wakes up to eat. I am leaving the dishes, even the pan that reeks of salmon, for the morning.

Just thought this was one for the record. Goodnight!

Pretty In Pink

Hello from Babyland. We've been re-cooping, going through the ups and downs, and playing babies. My mom and dad came out for a week and took care of me, then we had a week on our own, then my niece Angie came for a week last week to hold the baby and entertain the boys. We are so thankful for their help and will miss them!
So, tomorrow will be four weeks since she was born and we begin being on our own for good. I am feeling a lot better physically and emotionally and I think I'm figuring out how to get Anna to sleep even with the noisy boys here but that will be my biggest challenge this week.
She is changing every few days. We no longer have any idea who she looks like but she does look like both of her brothers.

We love it when she puts her arms over me like this.
Grandma and Grandpa with grandchild number 23!
The boys were a little perturbed that they couldn't have me all to themselves and spent the week with Grandma and Grandpa at a safe distance until their last day or so here.
Reading to them is a sure way to win them over.
Sam loves Anna. He sings to her and like to get her pacifier even though she usually spits it out.

Today was the first day I went to church. Here's Anna in her dress from Grandma all ready for her first Sunday. The boys were proud to show her off.
Pretty in her first dress.
Here's her favorite place to be - held!
Not thinking about what I'm writing so much as just wanting to get the pictures up and say we're doing well. I think the boys will appreciate having me all to themselves, and Anna, this week. I am feeling stronger and hope to get out of the house so the boys don't spend so much time watching TV.

Now I'm going to hold my baby, listen to her breathe, and smell her baby smell! I love this girl! I feel so much more of a kinship than I did with the boys. Maybe it's just easier to bond with one than it was with two, or maybe it's the fact that I am actually getting some sleep this time around, but I feel like we're such good friends.

My Girl!

She's here! Our beloved Georgianna Ruth, or Anna, made her grand entrance into the world on Monday. This little squishy bundle weighed in at 8 lbs and measured 21 inches. I woke up Monday morning with painful contractions at 6:45 am and got to the hospital at 9:30. She was born at 12:30! There was no time for any medication but at least it was fast. I pushed for 30 minutes and was so excited to see her. She's been my little friend these last nine months and I feel like we already have a relationship. I was so alert after the birth and could think straight, something that took me weeks after the boys were born. I highly recommend having children one at a time and avoiding c-sections!
She's perfect in every way. She's eating like a champ and sleeps a lot. With the boys there wasn't enough food to go around and we were all exhausted and crazy from the crying. She only cries when she's hungry and then feeding her takes care of that for a few hours. What a concept!!!
Hello world! I'm a little sleepy!
Her big brothers are being incredible. They were so excited to see her and have given up their places in the middle of the van so Anna can be there. They are feeling more grown up, we all are, and are helping a lot. That's not to say they're not trying various attention-getting devices, but they are acting more mature sometimes too. It's great to watch.
Josh took the whole week off of work and has let me sleep the mornings away while he takes care of the boys and does clean up duty. Tomorrow my parents are coming for a week and I feel so blessed to be able to enjoy this baby! She is so kissable and makes adorable noises when she nurses. She sneezes sometimes and then kind of screams as if to say, "What was that?" We love her and are so happy she's here!

Happy Easter

Were you this excited about Easter this year? The excitement level at our house was contagious. The boys had completely forgotten all about how we celebrate Easter and everything was new to them. Check out the boy-colored eggs. I don't think I've ever had Easter without a pink hard boiled egg. Blue, green, purple, even brown. We had them all. We dyed them yesterday afternoon and promised the Easter Bunny would hide them so they could hunt for them this morning. We did it all together and Sam was so excited about "what we did with our mom and dad!" When they tried to peel them this morning Michael was excited to find out they had "butter" inside, the yolk. I think he may have eaten 4 or 5 egg yolks. Cholesterol anyone?
The Easter Bunny had to plan ahead this year just in case we were at the hospital or had a new born when the day rolled around. He brought pads of paper and crayons and Sam drew his first recognizable picture today - a pirate ship. I should take a picture of that too. There were bubble wands and, of course, some jelly beans and chocolates. Nothing like a little sugar for breakfast to get a kid off on the right mood for the day!
This is blurry but I love the expression on Michael's face.

After Conference we set to work making our Easter dinner. I decided against ham in favor of a boneless pork loin roast but had the creamed new potatoes and peas, Brussels sprouts and rolls with some sparkling limeade. My helpers made it more fun. I love that he's wearing gloves to scrub the potatoes. Don't want dishpan hands, you know.

I really should be better about letting the boys help me more. They love doing things they see me do and it keeps them from fighting, but it is so messy and stressful:
Stay away from the stove.
Don't touch the knife.
You can't eat roll dough. Because it's just gross.
Be careful not to push him off the chair.
Please don't turn up the mixer so high.
Excuse me, I need to get in there.
Ah well. You get the idea.

But look at the smile on that face. "I am helping! I am big! I can DO IT!" This is the mantra around here these days so I might as well start teaching them how to do more accurately and embrace a certain level of help, precarious though it may be.

You would think they would eat more of a meal they helped make, but the call of the Easter Cake was too loud. All day Michael kept checking on it in the fridge just to make sure it was still there and to decide which jelly beans he would like to eat. I loved it.
I brought out the china plates and put some daffodils on the table. The boys may not like pork roast, but Josh and I did, and it was such a nice Easter. I was able to listen to so much more General Conference than I have the past few years. I actually took some notes this afternoon! So many of the talks were addressed to parents and I really felt inspired in ways I can help my family more and really think about my parenting instead of just winging it so much.

There was a great feeling in our home today and I hope that can continue as I try to be more patient with and focused on the boys, oh, until the new baby comes, that is!

Here are some movie clips from the day. My favorite is the egg hunt when they fail to see the egg on the rug by the door. Hope it puts a smile on your face. Happy Easter!

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

6 Days to Go, But Who's Counting

Freezer, full. Nursery, assembled. Hospital bag, packed. Baby clothes, washed. Diaper basket, full. Car seat, in the car if not installed. Tomorrow is April 1st and I am trying not to think about having a baby any day now. I had some signs of labor on Sunday and thought she might be here by now, but I'm still waiting. I had an ultrasound yesterday to make sure she's growing and she's measuring 10 days behind, as far as they can tell, so I guess she can keep on cookin' in there another week and it would be good for her but I need to get my mind on something else! Here's our tiny lawn that can be mowed in less than 5 minutes. When Josh says, "I'm going to mow the lawn" I have to remember how small it is and not think he's going to be busy for 2 hours and need a shower. He did this when he got home from work, with some helpers, of course.

Here's another father-son moment. What IS under that hood? Just a basic lesson in guy stuff.


The girls in my ward had a little shower for me with Cafe Rio salad and lemon cake! There are three of us due next week, so it was so nice to have a little party just for me while everyone is so busy. I have to say the girl clothes are so much more fun than boy clothes! Two Sundays ago my cousin Robert and his wife Colleen stayed with us on their way to San Francisco and points south. It was such a beautiful spring evening and we had the table all set with a while table cloth, yellow napkins, and green goblets. I only have 4 goblets so if you visit kids will be having IKEA plastic cups! We watched the health care vote and had roasted chicken and vegetables then pound cake with strawberries and vanilla ice cream. It was so fun to see them!


Then on Saturday we had more fun visitors. My cousin Sarah stopped by on her way to Oregon. See a theme here? We live in a great pit stop! We grew up together but I don't even remember the last time I saw her and I know I haven't seen many of her kids at all! We had a nice visit and let the kids play. I am always amazed how well my boys play with family. It's like a 6th sense and they just take to each other like fish to water. When they left Sam was sad and said, "I just wish they could stay." I did too.

So, I could have another week or only a few days. I guess that's pretty much the same thing. I can't do a lot and am trying to enjoy the wait. The blessing is that the boys have been playing incredibly well together. I have so much time on my hands since we're not going out much that I am feeling ready for a third. We'll see how I feel on my second week of sleep deprivation! I am worried about giving enough attention to the boys and making sure they feel loved with less of my time, but we'll just get through that like all families do.

Wish You Were Hear

I started keeping track of some of the precious things I hear the boys say. Here's my list so far . . .

December 22, 2009 at bedtime
Me: If I hear any talking I will take away your stuffed animals tonight.
Sam: But talking is so fun!

January 24, 2010
Michael: Don’t sing that song. That is crazy to my mind!

January 26, 2010
Sam Listening to Mormon Tabernacle Choir's “Homeward Bound”
“Mom, this song makes me happy.”

January 30, 2010
Sam: A long time ago in a galaxy far, far awake . . .

February 2, 2010
Sam: Pats my tummy and says, “I love Anna.”

February 10, 2010 When I broke a needle on the sewing machine for the 3rd time.
Me: Oh no!
Michael: What’s the matter, Sweetheart?
Me: I broke the needle on my sewing machine.
Michael: Oh. Maybe a sandwich will help. (Offers me a bite of his!)

February 13, 2010
Sam: I can’t wait to see my sister Anna.

February 15, 2010
I was crying in my closet while getting dressed, not feeling well.
Michael: Mom, what’s the matter?
Me: I don’t feel good today.
Michael: I’ll get the doctor kit. (Gave me a big, long hug and rubbed my back).

February 23, 2010
Sam: Mom, I love your hair. Mom, your arms are soft.

Michael: Mom, when I’m a man I’ll be bigger than Anna.
Me: When you’re a man Anna will be a woman.
Michael: Can I marry her? (He recently discovered he can’t marry me either).

Me: I don’t feel good today.
Michael: We will help you today so Anna can be healthy.

February 24, 2010
Sam: When we choose the right then we’re happy. When we don’t choose the right we’re sad. Michael helps me choose the right at night.
Me: How does he do that?
Sam: He helps me to stay in bed.

March 8, 2010
Michael: In my movie Darth Vadar won’t die.

Michael: Let’s play a push-down game.
Dad: What will we push over?
Michael: You! (Tackles Dad!)

Sam: I’m so happy because I have a mommy and a sister. In my apartment I didn’t have a yard or a sister!

March 11, 2010 – when the boys woke up in the morning.
Michael: Where’s Mommy? She’s not in bed.
Sam: She’s in the pillows. (About 5 pillows keep me propped up the right way at night)

March 14, 2010
Michael: What if we have another baby? Then we would be so happy!
Sam: If it’s a sister her name can be Lollipop.
Me: It could be another brother.
Michael: I want a brother.

March 15, 2010 at bedtime
Sam: Mom, you’re like a chicken nugget.
Me: You’re like a French fry.
Sam: You’re like a garden.
Me: You’re like the beautiful stars.
Sam: You’re like the moon.
Me: You’re like the sunshine.
Sam: You’re like a cake.
Me: You’re like the ice cream on a cake.
Sam: Mom, I love you!

I love these glimpses into their hearts and minds. They are little flowers blooming and we are starting to see more and more of their beauty as they grow and are able to communicate more with us. We thought we'd better save these precious things to read when they're 15!

View From the Top

I have four weeks until my big day.

Here's my daily view from the top . . . and the side. I feel enormous and my maternity shirts are mostly tight across the belly already, but I just looked at pictures from when I was expecting the boys and I was definitely bigger with them both in there, I guess I just forgot.

The other day I made a trip to M*arshalls with the boys. I think I'm about through shopping with them because I can't chase after them and they ignore my pleas to stay by me! I was looking through the pj's for something cute to live in after the baby's born while Michael was eating this, wrapper and all. I promise we had just eaten lunch at home, but what child of mine could resist a bunny-shaped Lindt chocolate? We had to buy it.

I was just trying to tell myself it would be a good idea to stop eating desserts until after the baby is born, but I couldn't resist that bunny either and had a few bites within one hour of my new resolution!

The bedding is on the crib. The bouncy seat is cleaned and assembled with fresh batteries in it. We really are just trying to stay busy until she's born.